Tag: forgiveness

Friendship

On By Bp. Justin ElwellIn Applied Theology, Inspiration1 Comment

When we study the Gospels, Acts, and the Epistles, we note rather quickly that the apostles did not always get along. They disagreed. They contended for favor. They mocked and grew frustrated with each other. Yeshua knew that in His absence, they could potentially divide what He had united.

In John 15:17 we read, “These things I command you, so that you may love one another.”

We don’t often realize it, but the human – from our earliest stages of development – must be taught, reminded and corrected about how to treat the human other. When your children were young, do you recall telling them to “be nice,” or “share”? What you were actually doing was teaching them how to be a friend.

Messiah, in John 15:17, is laying a foundation of friendship among those who will carry His message to the world; a world that will not be a friend to them, in fact, it will hate them (Jn. 15:18-19; cf. Jas. 4:4). His foundation allowed for the dynamic of human relationships.

The human heart longs for friendship; it is, after all, consistent with our design, having been created in the “image and likeness” of the Godhead dwelling in perfect communion.

The Scriptures have much to say about the nature of friendship:

The wounds of a friend are faithful (Prov. 27:6). Their counsel is sweetness (Prov. 27:9). A friend sharpens our countenance (Prov. 27:17). “A man with many friends may be harmed by them, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother” (Prov. 18:24).

Unlike the family we are born into, friendship is a choice. Remember the words of Messiah, “You did not choose Me, but I chose you” (Jn. 15:16). The beauty of this choice is that He chose us with our imperfections. He didn’t wait for us to be: perfect, totally reformed, well-dressed, well-mannered, agreeable. He chose us as we were; and by communion with Him, He changes and ultimately perfects us (Ro. 8:28-29).

Messiah was mocked for the friendships He kept, “The Son of Man came eating and drinking, and they say, ‘Look, a glutton and a drunkard, a friend of tax collectors and sinners!’ Yet wisdom is vindicated by her deeds” (Matt. 11:19). Why would Messiah be a friend to tax collectors and sinners? Why did He desire to be a friend to you?

Let’s consider some Hebrew words that are translated “friend” in order to gain a broader perspective on friendship.

1. רע, from “see,” rendered as neighbor, companion and friend.

2. חבר, fellowship, friendship, to be knit together.

3. אהב, love, friend.

4. ידיד, friend.

So a friend is someone you see, spend time with, have affection for, and with whom you share kindness, even stress.

While חבר reveals to us how the lives of friends are “knit together” like a tapestry, the final word that I shared above explains how that is accomplished. ידיד, simply means “friend,” however it is formed by combining two words that create a beautiful visual.

יד + יד = ידיד, (yad + yad); יד means “hand,” so the picture of friends are those living “hand in hand.”

I appreciate what Tim Keller writes about friendship, “Friendship is a deep oneness that develops when two people, speaking the truth in love to one another, journey together to the same horizon.”

The Basis of Friendship is:

1. Covenant – with the Lord and others. Part of the stipulations of covenant with the Lord is that we will reach out our hand, see above, to neighbors, strangers, brothers, tax collectors and sinners, etc.

2. Time and Consistency.

3. Connectedness and Presence.

4. Sacrificial (Jn. 15:13) and Careful.

5. Honesty – truth in love.

6. Counsel.

In messianic faith, our friendships are an outgrowth of the friendship we have with Yeshua. What did Yeshua say? “You are My friends if you do what I command you” (Jn. 15:14). This is a conditional statement. We must do what He has commanded: love one another; love the stranger, neighbor, enemy; do to others what you would have them do to you (Matt. 7:12).

He is the covenant Lord. It may sound strange to our ears, but He has the authority to set conditions of our friendship/relationship with Him. Friendship with Yeshua is only possible because of His redemptive work on the Cross that has torn the curtain blocking intimacy with God. The grace of forgiveness begins, maintains and keeps His friendship with us, and others.

Yet, Yeshua was able to share friendship with sinners because of His intimacy with the Father. Communion with Yeshua is the avenue by which we develop friendships and relationships with the lost, and ultimately fulfill our calling in His commission (Matt. 28:18-20), without relaxing our grip on His hand, or His grip on ours.

Be well. Shalom.

At the Carwash … Again

On By Bp. Justin ElwellIn Inspiration1 Comment

My current vehicle, a 2015 Jeep Cherokee, has survived the changing of the central New York seasons fairly well; and by that I mean salt season. Yes, we have a salt season!

In order to keep the roads clear of ice and snow during the winter … sometimes fall and spring as well … the State, counties, and municipalities of New York spread salt on the road ways, often with sand. This is both good and bad.

Helpful for keeping our vehicles out of the ditches in winter, but as the temperatures climb, that salt begins to eat our vehicles, metaphorically of course, but the results are much the same.

So we wash. In my case, too many times a year I visit a local carwash. In the warm months, to get the dirt and dust off of the vehicle; but in the winter, to get the salt off.

Almost immediately, after leaving the carwash, the Jeep is dirty again. So why continue to go?

Yom Kippur is like a carwash; admittedly, a much longer one. Today, it is not observed as it was when the Temple stood; and in messianic faith, we approach the feast differently anyway. The sacrifices are gone, the goats are no longer involved, even the Levitical high priest is no more; but sin remains, needing to be cleansed.

The observance today is focused on praying for forgiveness, in hopes of reconciliation, in addition to fasting – וְעִנִּיתֶם, אֶת-נַפְשֹׁתֵיכֶם/“and you shall afflict your souls,” and then, hearing the final shofar/trumpet.

Life gets dirty, even in messianic faith, as we travel along the way. Dirt, dust, grime and salt begins to take a toll on us. It builds up, and under the weight of this dirt, we find less than desirable attitudes and reactions come to the surface creating issues in precious relationships: anger, resentment, short tempers, bitterness, etc.

The lesson learned on this one day, Yom Kippurim, the Day of Atonements – yes it’s plural – we should apply every day of the year; we must visit the carwash of repentance, through prayer and godly reconciliation on a daily basis. We need to walk in His grace.

The apostle John wrote, “But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus his Son cleanses us from all sin. If we say we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness” (I Jn. 1:7-9).

Perhaps read that again.

John is drawing upon lessons from Yom Kippur, when sin was brought to light, confessed, and cleansed by blood; even now, if we confess our sins He is “faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleans us from all unrighteousness.”

The fear is that He will not forgive us; but John assured us that He will. Why? Yeshua/Jesus.

Yom Kippur is a trip to the spiritual carwash, where we learn to walk in the grace that we receive that heals the fellowship between us and God, and us and our dear ones.

Get in the carwash. Get the dirt off. Feel the cleansing of the water, as it cleanses even those hard to reach places in our hearts and minds. It’s easy to clean the outside, it’s the underside and the inside that is painfully difficult; but did Messiah say,

“First clean the inside of the cup and the plate, that the outside also may be clean” (Matt. 23:26).

When washed my Jeep shines in the light; but how much more does our soul shine when it is washed by the blood of the Lamb as we walk in His light?

Yeshua, the risen Lord and eternal High Priest still cleanses and restores those who trust in His name; as the old hymn says, “there’s a fountain flowing for the soul unclean, O be washed in the blood of the Lamb?”

Be well. Shalom.

Forgive them…

On By Bp. Justin ElwellIn Applied Theology, Inspiration1 Comment

It was said: unforgiveness caused the holy altar in the Jerusalem Temple to weep. Why? Unforgiveness.

Unforgiveness, from an intentional act or something unintentional, separates; it divides.

The altar is the place where sacrifice was offered. One word for sacrifice קָרְבָּן/qārbān, means to draw near, and is from a root meaning to approach or be near to; it is also the root of cherub. The altar is where man approached God; and then, from a place of His forgiveness, he would then reconnect to man. Drawing near to God will inevitably draw us nearer to others.

The first sacrifice listed in Leviticus 1 is the עֹלָה קָרְבָּנוֹ, the Burnt Offering, or raising up and near to sacrifice. It was a total offering to God, representing the worshipper giving himself totally to God (Ro. 12:1); but it could not be given while in unforgiveness. As one draws near, and the other divides.

In that divide we dwell alone, giving not to God or others, but only to ourselves; as we cultivate the fruit of unforgiveness in our lives. The heart principle of godly sacrifice was giving our best to God, not ourselves. When we give we draw close. When we give the best of ourselves, we then invest ourselves, our lives, not in ourselves, but God.

In Genesis 2:18, the Torah says:

וַיֹּאמֶר יְהוָה אֱלֹהִים, לֹא-טוֹב הֱיוֹת הָאָדָם לְבַדּוֹ

“And the Lord God said, ‘It is not good that the man should be alone.”

When we are alone, in unforgiveness, we give to ourselves, and only ourselves. In fact, we take, rather than give. Isolation breaks us down, drives us inward, not outward.

Messiah Yeshua/Jesus taught:

“For if you forgive others their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you, but if you do not forgive others their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses” (Matt. 6:14-15).

Additionally, at the conclusion of the parable of the unforgiving servant (Matt. 18:21-35): “So also My heavenly Father will do to you, unless each of you, from your hearts, forgives his brother” (Matt. 18:35). Note the word “torture” in verse 34, not that God Himself will torture us; but rather, we will actually become our own torturers. Allowing torment to reside in our hearts and minds.

Why would He not forgive us in our unforgiveness towards others? We can answer this in many valid ways, but it is simple: unforgiveness not only divides us from those we are not forgiving, it separates us from Him. We turn, as it were, not to Him, but away from Him. We can rationalize unforgiveness in many ways, but in the end, extending forgiveness is not for them but for us. They may not want it, ask for it, or know they need it; but the act of forgiveness releases us from holding a debt that accrues bitterness, resentment, anger, and hatred. Yes, there is no condemnation for those in Christ (Ro. 8:1), but neither would we be living rightly by the Spirit of God in Christ while walking in unforgiveness!

If the sages conceived of the altar crying due to unforgiveness, how much more does our Father in heaven weep at unforgiveness? How much more does He agonize over our separations?

There is so much unforgiveness in the world; and surprisingly, it is rampant in the congregation of God as well. No matter the reason, it is not good for man to be alone; but especially alone in unforgiveness. It’s time we trust in the grace that God has extended in forgiveness, and experience the power of the Gospel in our lives once again. We must learn to place our hurt, and the cause of it, upon Messiah, whereby we draw close to Him and every promise found in Him (II Cor. 1:20). He gave us the example, while nailed to the cross, bloodied and beaten: “Forgive them Father, for they know not what they do.” Yes, we are not that strong, and we are not Him; BUT, we are in Him, therefore, we can, we will, and we must. Yet, it takes humility. Listen to Peter’s words:

“Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you, casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you” (I Pet. 5:6-7).

Be well. Shalom.